At the youth fall retreat recently, I posed a question to our teens: What if we could see each other’s thought bubbles (like the thought bubbles in a cartoon strip), particularly when it came to our thoughts in relationships. When two people interact, how much of our thoughts are based on fear and how does that corrupt the hopes and love we ought to have as Christians.
When we greet someone we don’t know that well, if at all, what are our thoughts filled with? I love to see my little ones interact with others, especially when they were really young. You can just see imagine their thought bubbles bursting once they see someone else:
“A NEW FRIEND!”
“What games are we going to play?”
“I wonder if you like the same things I do?”
Somewhere along the line those thoughts start to be overtaken by thoughts of fear. I can see it start to happen once my little one starts hiding behind my leg or once their words abruptly halt from 100 words a minute to zero. Compare the eager child who gets dropped off at a playground with the teen who gets dropped off at a youth event.
“Will others think I’m stupid?”
“I wish I had nicer clothes so others wouldn’t think I look bad.”
“Will others even want me to be included?”
The thoughts of fear can be so familiar to us that we don’t even notice them… sort of like the odd stain on the carpet at our house that was from 6 Thanksgivings ago. We don’t notice it. I just wonder how much those fearful and insecure thoughts rob us of being proactive in reaching out to others. How often are we plagued with spinning our wheels on making sure we don’t look like idiots, instead of spending our energy making others feel welcomed, accepted and loved.
I mean can you imagine if you were a part of a community where people were honestly more concerned about others’ reputation and others’ affirmation rather than our own? If our thought bubbles were more innocent and bursting! That is the type of church that outsiders would see as distinct and actually different. More than what colors, lights, and music are employed… but do people here actually value others above themselves?
I challenged the teens to grab hold of their thought bubbles and change them. I challenge you and myself to do the same.